Are you an emotionally intelligent salesperson? (Part 1)

Welcome to the first of a three-part series on Emotional Intelligence in Sales. It really is the new paradigm of selling. Make sure you and your team are not left behind!

Firstly, let’s define what emotional intelligence is not. Emotional intelligence or EI, is not "being emotional". It is not being hijacked by your emotions, it is not being “high-maintenance”.

EI is the ability to identify the emotions in ourselves and others, to plan for the use of emotions, to understand the origin of these emotions and to manage the emotions effectively. It is the ability to perceive emotions, to access and generate emotions so as to assist thought; to understand emotions and emotional knowledge and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote intellectual growth.

Emotional intelligence is an ABSOLUTE critical skill in selling, along with FLEXIBILITY, PASSION AND ENTHUSIASM.

The salesperson who knows the product inside out will not succeed without the additional ability to forge strong relationships, win trust, assess how the client is feeling, and cope with their own feelings, including disappointment.

Emotional Intelligence has proven a better predictor of future success than traditional methods like the GPA, IQ, standardised test scores and even “Myer-Briggs style questions” and researchers have concluded that sales people who manage their own feelings well and deal effectively with others are more likely to live content lives and sell quicker and with less “buyers remorse”. Plus, happy sales people are more apt to retain information and clients more effectively than dissatisfied people. Yet salespeople are not aware or at least practicing becoming more emotionally intelligent. What makes it different to IQ is Emotional Intelligence is a skill which can be practiced and improved.

Take the test

Answer the following questions with a simple 'Yes' or 'No'.

1. Are you always aware of the subtleties of your own feelings?
2. Do you usually know what other people are feeling, even if they don't say so?
3. Does your awareness of what others are going through give you feelings of compassion for them?
4. Can you carry on doing the things you want to do under distressing circumstances, so they don't control your life?
5. When you're angry, can you still make your needs known in a way that resolves rather than exacerbates the situation?
6. Can you hang on to long-term goals, and avoid being too impulsive?
7. Do you keep trying to achieve what you want, even when it seems impossible and it's tempting to give up?
8. Can you use your feelings to help you to reach decisions in your life?
9. Do you not hold grudges?
10. Are you calm in periods of stress?

How did you go? How would your sales team go?

Our society is growing more and more diverse. Selling is changing weekly and some sales teams are being left behind by not keeping up. Salespeople are likely to meet people from a wide range of backgrounds, and form good relationships with them. This means being sensitive to different viewpoints, and especially, being able to challenge your own assumptions when you meet difference. This takes high self-confidence, self-awareness, and empathy, all emotional intelligence competencies. Emotional intelligence is the key to selling in the latter half of this decade.

For the conclusion of this article and to learn the doctor of sales ”Magic rule of selling",

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